I found out from my current man that I maybe am dominant. When I shared with him that I got turned on when he was scared during a horror movie, he said “of course, that’s because you are dominant”. All my life I was living with an accepted fact that I’m a submissive in sex. I like that part of me, though I was always curious to try dominating, like having a man making any move unless I tell him to, so I will be “orchestrating” sex.

Usually, I take pleasure in sex while relaxing and not needing to think…

Other stories about this French man are here, here and here. What I’m about to say is connected to the third story (or was part of those events).

One man from “feeld” app asked me about my craziest sex experience with dating apps. Every time I’m asked this question, I reply differently.

It happened in my hometown where he traveled. Middle of the night, him standing in the closed yard of my house, I’m on the last floor on a balcony, naked. I went out undressed as I was woken up. He, down there, sending me text exempts from “Romeo…

Not a Fun Story, but Crucial

If I want you to choose and to read only 1 among all my stories, I’d recommend this one. And you will probably not like it. But it might help you understand something about women to treat them nicer in non-obvious ways.

Some background about me:

  1. I graduated from a 5-year course on gestalt psychotherapy. Hence I know some stuff about people.
  2. I am ever curious and exploring about my sexuality (as you can see from the blog), I open up for experiences and I believe sex can take me to a dimension that…

A Napolitan sex god orders me to keep the door open and lay on the bed and touch myself. He arrives, without taking any clothes off, he lays between my legs and continues my work with his tongue.

Then he takes off clothes to take on the condom, while he opens it up, I am laying on bedside and move to suck it, because why the beauty should stay untouched. But that did not last long. After sex, some weed and more sex, as usual. That was our routine.

Reality: frankly I wish he told that to me earlier before…

Here is my earlier article about Italian Sex god. But time goes by, and gods too become outdated. Still, I don’t doubt that sex would be as divine as it was many times before. But he lives in Australia now. The case is closed.

The more mature I get, the fewer and simpler things I want, sex included. In a definition of a sex god, I’d write: good in and outside of sex.

By “outside” I mean aftercare (hugs, kisses, caring etc), chill, comfort, easiness, coziness, non-bullshitness, interesting talks. …

It is not obvious, but I must state I am all in for equality and feminism.

Lately, I bump into pieces of information, which made me reflect on this topic: In many ways I envy men. It’s not about “white men” privilege, even though it may seem so. I’m trying to pass through the thorns to the stars, and make you see past what seems to be the truth from the first sight.

Men have more guts than women. You do more and think (doubt) less. You are more out in the world than women. You believe in yourself more…

Artists Cy Twombly and Lucian Freud now fascinate me the most. My current obsession started with antipathy and even disgust.

Cy Twombly “School Of Fontainebleau”, 1960, arthur.io

I asked myself shameful questions like “Is this really art?”, “Would there be a scandal if this really was done by a child?”. They popped in my head even after reading a dozen books on art history and theory. Two of those books even had such pretentious names as these questions.

I was puzzled about Freud and Twombly, despite knowing how to look behind the scenes and how to understand art.

A quick disclaimer on how to understand art:

  1. You…

Pieter Bruegel the Elder

“ The Dutch Proverbs”, 1559

In his paintings, people are like pearls fallen on the floor. They are chaotic, and still, you can see a picture in that, you can see an interaction between them and see the patterns. Probably one may look at Breugels paintings like a viewer from atop to the fallen bunch of pearls.

When I looked at Breugel’s painting in the Old Art Museum in Berlin, I saw both personal stories and religious lessons about sins. So it’s a tough task to understand Breugel. You must read and think. But when I…

Each of us had a moment of enlightenment about an obvious but invisible pattern when the puzzle matches. I had such an epiphany. It’s closer to noticing several completely unrelated facts and being in awe of their happening. Enlightenment assumes a deep conclusion. With me, it was the opposite.

How often do you think such a situation can occur with the same person? A man is texting/sexting with a woman, while another woman is giving him a blowjob. What is hot in it exactly for each participant?

I was the one texting. It happened with me two times in two…

Expert in Choosing Food and Men

While I was walking past medical university and saw Indian looking student, I recalled my story with an Indian man. 10 minutes later I walked on the street where I met Israeli man, a similar kind of man passed me. Now it’s the time to recall two stories which I never mentioned here: about Indian and Israeli men.

I often joke that I know how to choose good food and men. Both men are very handsome and with perfect athletic bodies.

I met Israeli man in Odessa, Indian man — in Berlin.

First is…

Insignificant Importance

A mix of my real sexual stories and relationships dynamics with a pinch of analysis. All men read their stories where they played main role. Manager in tech.

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store